The Mask we never take off

Image by Brigitte Werner from Pixabay

“Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.”

Masking is a concept explored in the realms of psychology—where an individual conceals their true emotions, thoughts, or personality to avoid conflict or protect themselves. Though often attributed to conditions like autism, it’s not far-fetched to assume that, to some extent, everyone engages in it. And the reason is quite simple: to maintain a level of peace in the environment. Our true intentions, feelings, or thoughts may not always be socially acceptable, appropriate, or even nice. So, to maintain homeostasis—especially in a social context—we mask or hide our true feelings. But if we were given another face for a moment and freed from the consequences of what we say or feel, how much would our speech and actions change?

Throughout our lives, we continually evolve in response to shifting demands, opportunities, and limitations that come with different stages. As an individual grows, broad traits, coping styles, and social behaviors begin to emerge. By the end of the teenage years, a person has typically developed a unique way of dealing with life’s situations. These patterns are called a personality.

In an ideal world, once one forms these enduring patterns, they become mature, socially adjusted, and beneficial to themselves and the community at large. But what’s wrong with society? Why do so many people exhibit traits and behaviors that are maladjusted—unable to handle day-to-day stressors—or worse, harmful to themselves and those around them?

My Theory :  I argue that a key part of developing a healthy personality is learning to control our more animalistic propensities—like deviant sexual behaviors, violent acts, or uncontrolled speech. As we develop character, we train ourselves to behave appropriately, to speak politely—or at least in a socially acceptable manner. In essence, we hold at bay the impulse toward violence or inappropriate behavior.

If a teen’s first reaction is to hit a friend who offends them, the adults reprimand and correct that behavior. To avoid reprimand—and to benefit from living in society—the teen adjusts their attitude and behavior. Some might say that’s pretense. But think of it this way: if you pretend long enough and control your behavior consistently, it becomes an enduring pattern of thought and action—in essence, a personality. We become better because we no longer act on every vile impulse.

But what if society gave people an escape? A place to put on a mask and engage in the most vile kinds of behavior—behavior that would be completely unacceptable in reality? Chaos. People would live two lives, and indulging that dark side—if we may call it that—only makes it grow and seep into society.

The Mask   I believe this mask exists in certain modern avenues. Take social media: individuals are free to create online personas and comment the most vile, despicable things—saying exactly what they think on any subject, not just as free speech but outright bullying. I once saw a post about a police officer who created a fake account and bullied a young lady so severely, her life was in danger. Imagine—a fully grown adult hiding behind a screen and torturing someone vulnerable.

The second avenue is video games. With advancements in graphics and interactivity, people are given opportunities to act out violent scenes and even lewd sexual acts. The excuse? “It’s virtual reality, not real, so it doesn’t count.” But what are the effects on the mind and personality? No wonder we have teenagers shooting up schools. The subconscious mind—which largely drives behavior and attitude—doesn’t always differentiate between virtual and actual reality.

It extends further into violent films, explicit sexualized ads and movies. And then we wonder why there’s such a rampant rise in crime. It’s because we now have adults who never learned to control their animalistic propensities. Society has built a space where everything can be indulged—and now we can’t tell if we’re wearing the mask or not.

By beholding, we become changed. Therefore, gird up the loins of your mind, and be sober-minded. God help us.